Fair is when 2 people play a game according to the same rules.
Fair does not apply to life, but for some reason humans
have decided that we are entitled to fairness.
Now our desire for fairness is a handicap.
When the storms inevitably hit our lives we zoom in on what it's doing to us.
We judge the fairness of it, determining our level of victimhood in the moment.
"Why me? Why them? It's not fair."
Maybe...probably that's true...it's not fair.
Who said it's going to be fair?
What if we asked different questions?
What is this storm doing for me?
What lessons, skills, and perspectives are being offered to me
through this challenging moment?
Do I choose to accept these offerings?
Will this experience provide me with growth as a reward for living through it?
Maybe, as long as we cope with it appropriately.
Everything in our life provides us with a chance to feel it, react to it, and cope with it.
When we default to negative coping from a victim perspective we self-destruct, leaning on outside influences, substances, and distractions that
'save us' from the difficult moments.
We allow the storm to decide our fate and we take
nothing from it but the agony and pain it provides.
When we practice positive coping methods we respond with actions that are good for us, enabling us to grow through the experience.
We take the lesson, wisdom, and fortitude it provides.
What if we removed expectation of fairness?
What if we don't need it?
I am growing to respect and appreciate the difficult moments.
Because with this perspective the challenges we face give us the
opportunity to grow through the experience.
We only seize that opportunity when we choose to step in and face it, to handle it, and to sit in the rawness of the reality.
We only develop a true sense of reality when we stop trying to escape through easier choices, substances, or distractions.
Let's choose to walk through each experience, good or bad,
with a clear-mind and open-heart.
Fair or not, life is a beautiful challenge and I think you should be here for it.